Editor’s note: Lenny Ochieng, a Mombasa resident, explains why he thinks Kikuyu women make the best wives in Kenya.
I have dated quite a number of Kikuyu women since my first serious relationship when I was 19. Little wonder I ended up marrying one, and boy, don’t I love what this marriage brings.
Therefore, unlike so many “social media experts,” my perspectives are informed by experience and not unverified talk.
Kikuyu women are perhaps the best wife material in the country. However, as a man from the western part of Kenya, there are some things you need to get right before you marry a Kikuyu woman.
READ ALSO: I don’t have an ex, my wife is my first love – Kikuyu singer Samidoh
By Western Kenya, I mean the regions of Kalenjin, Luo, Kisii, Luhya, Teso, and so on.
I’m from the Luo community, and I must admit that our cultures in the “western union” are quite different from those practiced by the Kikuyu and the larger Mt Kenya communities.
The Luo culture, in particular, bestows so much power on a man that it can sometimes destroy him.
This is to say, a Luo man with money can have tens of concubines, and his clansmen will egg him on even when they know very well he has a family to feed and a future to build.
But that is a topic for another day.
The first thing to consider as a man is if you’re ready to settle down and raise a family. Only if you’re truly ready and done with drama should you consider settling down with the Wanjikus, Wanjirus, and Mukamis of Mt Kenya and the slopes of Aberdares.
These women despise time wasters and admire men who hustle and work hard.
If you’re a focused man, then a Shiro is likely to support you, with her singular ambition being to see you succeed.
But the problem will come the day you succeed and then your relatives start encouraging you to go “Kimila” (cultural) and take in a girl who speaks your tongue.
Some relatives may even encourage you to ditch your Shiro, citing that “no Okuyu grandma has ever been sighted in Nyanza because they all run away at a certain age.”
But to be fair, don’t you think you’d be inviting trouble if you’re the kind to swallow such foolish advice hook, line, and sinker?
So in essence, that’s how we have so many stories of “Oh, she ran away with children” or “she wiped my house clean,” yet those with clear eyes can see the husband started it all.
I have a daughter, and I would never wish to see her mistreated after dutifully assisting her husband build an empire.In the same vein, Shiro is likely to insist that you invest to cushion the family during hard times. This means she won’t support you to “kanyaga kreti” (down a crate of beer) on a daily basis when she knows the money can be invested in a Sacco to yield good returns enough to buy a plot in the future.
In this regard, I know a friend who hails from my Siaya backyard and who used to be followed to the club by his wife because of his excessive drinking habits.
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Today, my pal’s lastborn is in Form Four, and the burden of school fees has him admitting he would never have built a home in Syokimau had it not been for his ‘nagging’ Kikuyu wife.
He admits that, at the time, he considered his wife to be overbearing because she pushed him to build a house.
Thirdly, on a lighter note, you must steer clear of the country’s divisive politics when talking to your Mt Kenya in-laws.
These people love you more when you talk about development and not about how “Baba will take that thing early in 2022.”
The daughters and sons of the mountain abhor discussing politics with outsiders. A friend who accompanied a would-be bridegroom to Ruracio in Tharaka Nithi in early 2012 was stopped in his tracks after his hosts noticed he had turned the dowry negotiation into drumming up support for a Raila presidency.
” Umekunja kuongea kuhusu vire mtachukua msichana, ama mnataka tuongee kuhusu Raira reo haravu munje siku ingine ndio tuongee kuhusu ndaware (dowry). Ni huyu (pointing to the would-be bridegroom) anaoa ama ni Raira?” posed a stern-looking man in the negotiation party.
READ ALSO: Can a Kikuyu Man Marry a Luo Lady?
My friend would later realise while the inhabitants of Mt Kenya are generally friendly, they rarely enjoy discussing national politics with outsiders.
The opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the writer and do not necessarily reflect the position of GOTTA.news. We welcome writers to give their views on social and political issues. Send your opinion to [email protected].
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